Easy Seitan Sausages!
I have to just write this out and tell you the recipe, because with every passing second, my inner 10 year old is telling me to make dirty sausage jokes, and I know for a fact that I will give in.
So here goes…
It’s often difficult to create a delectable protein that can be used in a variety of ways. This sausage does just that.
Side order at Breakfast, in a pasta sauce, in a bun (straight from the BBQ), or just cut up and put in a sandwich. You can’t go wrong.
The ingredients are simple, and if you’re a vegetarian, you should have all of this in your kitchen already. if not, everything listed is worth the investment.
Make this because: You can tell all the jokes that I wanted to tell, but didn’t because my mom reads this and would not be impressed.
INGREDIENTS:
1 C, Gluten Flour
1 C (or less), Low Sodium Broth (I use Fake Beef)
1/2 t, each: Garlic powder, Onion powder, Cayenne
1 t, Cumin
1/4 T, Paprika
3/4 T, Soy Sauce (Low sodium)
3 T, Nutritional Yeast
2 Squirts, Liquid Smoke
RECIPE:
Mix wet ingredients together and make sure it is cool (fridge or freezer works quickest).
Mix dry ingredients in a bowl and mix thoroughly.
Now, mix wet + dry together. BUT WAIT!
Add half of the liquid, mix, and add more little by little until you have an evenly formed “dough” ball. No remaining dry mix. You do not want to over soak your seitan.
Now, cut into 3 even pieces and roll into a sausage.
Place in tinfoil and carefully wrap it up, twisting the edges when complete.
Steam for 40 minutes, flipping to make sure it steams evenly.
Remove from heat, tinfoil, and check it out!!! SAUSAGE!
Now, get creative!
Merry Christmas.
Mini Satan Sliders
Be honest.
Burgers, especially those of the vegetarian variety, don’t normally cut it.
Sure, you can cough up $10 for a box of frozen Lick’s burgers and call it a day. Or maybe you go the ‘pub’ route and get a blend of veggies that are shaped like burgers, but don’t come close to satisfying your taste buds.
Insert Black Bean & Chipotle Seitan Sliders. Or what I like to call, Mini Satan Sliders.
These tiny little devils are packed full of flavour and are actually ridiculously easy to make. The recipe actually came to me in a dream where I turned evil, killed all of man kind, destroyed the earth, yada yada yada, then went for a delicious veggie burger. Of course, with mankind being extinct, Utopia wasn’t open so I had to fend for myself. These sliders were the result.
Try them out the next time you’re going to a BBQ. I guarantee that even those carnivorous pals of yours will agree these burgers are a tasty, tasty time.
Ingredients:
PART 1
1 cup Corn
1 can black beans
1 can tomato paste
1 t - Paprika
1/4 t - Chipotle
1/2 t - oregano, parsley, basil, garlic
Few squirts, liquid smoke
1 can, choptle w adobo sauce - Blend, use 1T
6-7 jalapeno rings, cut into small pieces
PART 2
1/2 cup Gluten Flour
1/2 cup Bread crumbs
PART 3
1/2-3/4 cup - broth.
1/4 braggs/soya sauce
1/2 T olive oil
Directions:
Mix together everything from PART 1.
In a separate bowl, mix everything from PART 2 then add to PART 1. Do not stir.
Add PART 3 and stir everything together. You should end up with a texture similar to uncooked burgers. Knead a few times and set aside.
Heat Vegetable Oil in a frying pan and carefully form a patty with a spoon full of mix. You can make them about 1/2 an inch thick, or less.
Fry for 5 minutes on each side. Once done, pat off excess oil and place on a baking sheet in the oven for 20 minutes at 250•.
Now, if you want to remove the frying method, you can easily cook them up with less/no oil, or bake them the whole time. If you do decide on the all-oven method, I suggest 450• for about 30 minutes, give or take. Just keep an eye on them.
Okay. Enough small talk. Your sliders are done. Let’s add some toppings.
I used lettuce, tomato (for my friends, I would NEVER), some gouda, slices of apple (HOLY CHRIST was this a great addition), onions and salsa-ranch. Dress it like a burger. You should know by now.
And might I just say… these are pretty damn good burgers. Although i may keep experimenting and come up with some other cool variations. I noticed that the corn had a difficult time staying in the sliders so perhaps a heavenly corn-relish is in my near future? Or maybe a Buddah Slider?
(crickets)
My jokes are so bad today.
Til next time,
Dave Lock.
GLUTEN - BEFORE IT’S TOO LATE!
So… I’ve been having a lot of conversations with people who have recently seen their diets drastically change. Mostly due to allergic reactions, I now know more than a handful of people who cannot eat Avocado. OR CHEESE. And I’m not talking about my vegan pals who are making a conscious decision. Instead, I mean the people who wake up one day and can’t eat their fav foods!!! And yes, this is totally a thing. I suggest you get allergy tested, you lazy bum. That grilled cheese sandwich you ate last night? Could be worse for you than you think.
HOWEVER, in true Dave Lock fashion, I will switch the topic without any hesitation, and discuss this amazing seitan recipe I’ve just concocted. I tested a few other recipes and ultimately, Mine is probably the best. Although I found one that used chickpea flour and that sounds pretty slick, but whatever. I get style points for doing it in my underwear.
This is the easiest seitan recipe I could make for you. So make it, before you become allergic to gluten and wish you’d tried this. Which will happen.
1.5 cups Broth
1.5 cups Gluten Flour
1/4 t: Garlic, Onion Powder, Turmeric, Cumin
1/8 t: Poultry Seasoning, Pepper, Thyme
1T : Braggs (liquid seasoning)
1/2 T: Paprika
1 T: Oil
6 squirts, Liquid Smoke
Mix all dry ingredients together. Now hear this. I use those spices because I like them. But there is nothing saying you can’t use other spices if you are looking for a different flavour. Imagine a Garam masala seitan? That would be off the hook.
So just do what you want. We don’t judge here.
Okay, back to it. Stop being distracting.
Mix all wet ingredients together (separate bowl) and allow to cool.
Combine and stir until desired texture is reached (you may want to add more gluten flour at this point).
Knead and set aside for ten minutes.
Knead once more and you have seitan. Almost.
Boil some water and set a steamer on top. Your options include: a colander, strainer, or legit steamer. All work the same.
Cut your seitan into the shape of your desire. Steamed seitan is great for sausages but you could do a loaf, burgers or whatever else you can think of. STARS!!!
Wrap in tinfoil and steam for minimum 30 minutes. Also, make sure you are not piling the seitan on top of each other. It HAS to be even if you want them to cook.
Once done, remove and let cool for ten. And yes, you can totally peel back the tinfoil and take a look. It’s okay. I get you.
So that’s kind of it.
I just steamed a crap ton of seitan then cut it into mini tiny baby strips and slow cooked it into pulled ‘pork.’ What have you done today? SPIDERMAN!
Til next time,
Dave
