shove it down your pie hole.

HANGOVER BREAKFAST BOWLS

Your alarm clock goes off and you’ve already hit the snooze button 487 times. Somehow you find the strength to peel yourself from in between your sheets, and you hop into last nights jeans to start your day. It’s 8:45. You’ve got 15 minutes to get to work, but first things first, you need some nourishment. 

You could easily grab a $4 breakfast sandwich from Tim’s, or stop in at the <insert chain restaurant here> and grab an overpriced breakfast in hopes of fighting off your massive hangover. 

But wait - you spent an hour this past Sunday preparing the below recipe, and that means you are more than taken care of. 

This all vegan recipe is incredibly easy to prepare, no matter how difficult it may seem. I promise you this. 

With ONE ingredient, you can make these amazing little hash brown nests, and then fill them up with one of the most delicious Tofu Scramble recipes EVER. Add in the fact that you can freeze these beauties and heat them up in only a few minutes, and you have yourself a winner. 

Make these because: You don’t need to be awake in the morning to enjoy a delicious homemade breakfast. You’re welcome.

INGREDIENTS:

1 Brick, extra firm tofu
1/2 red pepper, chopped
3 cloves, garlic
1 medium shallot, diced
1 jalapeño, minced
1/2 t, turmeric
1 t, paprika
1 cup, Kale, cut into small pieces, stems removed.
1 T, Lemon juice 
2 baking potatoes
1 T, chipotle (optional)
1/2 T, brags (or low sodium soya sauce)
2 T, nutritional yeast (or daiya/cheese)
S&P

DIRECTIONS:

Clean and scrub your potatoes. Bake in the oven at 400• for 45-60 minutes. 

You don’t want to cook them until they are too soft. Just enough so that you can grate them. Once done, cool in the fridge, peel, and grate. 

Press your tofu and try to get out as much water as possible. Break up into a big bowl and with your hands. Break it down as much as possible. Add in your turmeric, chipotle, paprika and a little salt. 

Mix it all together and set aside. 

Now, heat some oil in a pan on low and toss in your onion. Once translucent, add in red pepper, garlic, & jalapeños. Cook for about five minutes. 

Add in the tofu scramble and raise heat to medium. 

Now, add in your brags and nutritional yeast, stir well, and finally add in your kale and lemon juice. 

Grab a muffin tray, and either spray it with cooking oil, or simply take a little bit of vegan butter and rub the edges with a paper towel. 

Spoon in a hefty portion of the grated potato and push down, forming a nest. 

Finish off with a grind of pepper and bake in the over at 450 for about 20 minutes. 

Once crispy on the top, fill with a spoon or two of scramble, pack it in, and return to the oven for another 10-15 minutes. 

See, that wasn’t difficult, was it?

Once they’ve cooled down, you can easily remove them from the tray with a spoon or fork. 

I wrapped mine in tin-foil and put them in the freezer so I can reheat quickly in the mornings. 

 YOU ARE GOING TO LOVE THESE!!

Spend the rest of the day bragging to your friends about how amazing these breakfast cups taste. Even better, reheat one of these the next time you’re having a slower than normal morning and watch how fast you start to feel better. 

Kale Pasta w Creamy Avocado Tahini

I had less than thirty minutes and needed a healthy, filling, dinner. 

Instead of doing what we all wish we could do every night (duh, order pizza), I decided to whip up this simple pasta dish. 

It’s also spring and I really enjoy cold pasta dishes (at least the healthy ones), so I cooled off the leftovers and guess what? 

It was delicious.

Oh, and there’s like, 0.5 ingredients. There’s really no excuse. 

Make this because: Eating pasta with pasta sauce from a jar doesn’t cut it anymore. You’re better than that.

Ingredients:

2 servings of a small Pasta 
1/4 bush, Kale
1 Avocado
4 T, Tahini
1/2-1 Lemon (or lime if thats what you have)
2 cloves, Garlic
4 T, or more, Water 
S&P
(optional) sprinkle of Chili Flakes
(optional) Olive Oil

Directions:

Cook pasta as per instructions. 

In blender, mix everything else (minus Kale & chili flakes)).

Add water, S&P as needed, until you have a nice creamy mixture, with a garlicky bite.

Once pasta is done, strain and return to pot with a small drip of olive oil. Add in sauce and stir, keeping pot on low. 

Cut the stems from your kale and discard, then cut leaves (make sure they’re washed), into small, bite sized pieces. 

Add to pasta and mix well. Top with a sprinkle of chili flakes if you want. I always do, and I’m awesome.

Now for the fun part. 

EAT IT!

Or chill the whole darn thing. Whatever makes you happy, bb. 

Enjoy!

Dave 

SPICY GREEN WINTER SOUP

I’m going to Austin, Texas next week to take part in the annual SXSW music festival. While the main portion of the week will be spent working (trying to find clients for my new, super-amazing job at Ticketfly), I plan on partying hard and seeing as many bands as possible. More importantly, I will be enjoying the beautiful weather. And I’m sure you can relate. The winter here in Toronto has been less than hospitable and I’m ready for some sun!

Which brings me to my latest recipe. A thick, hearty, vegan soup, made out of only a few ingredients, which only took me about 30 minutes to make. Because it may be cold, but we sure as hell don’t have to be. 

Sound like your kind of meal? I thought so too. 

Make this because: We all need an excuse to vigorously blend things once in a while. Plus, you can have 1,000 pieces of bread with it and nobody will judge you. 

Ingredients:
1 head, Cauliflower
1 head, Broccoli
1 Shallot
3 ounces, Spinnach
2-3 cloves of garlic
2 cups, broth (low sodium if possible)
1/4 Cup, Nutritional Yeast
1.5 Cups, Unsweetened Rice Milk (or alternative)
1 Avocado
1 t, nutmeg
2 T, Vegan Butter
1 T, Red Chili Flakes
1 T, Flour (omit if GF)
Cracked Black pepper

Directions:
On low heat, melt butter. Add chopped up onion and garlic and sauté for a good few minutes. Once translucent, add pepper and nutmeg, and stir it in.

Cook for another minute before adding your flour, Spinach, Cauliflower and Broccoli. Mix well, and raise heat to med. Add broth and cover for 10-15 minutes or until the veggies are nice and soft. 
Add milk, chili flakes, nutritional yeast & remove from heat. 

So far, we’ve spent a total of 20-25 minutes in the kitchen. 

You’re doing great. 

Now, you can either hand blend this, or use a traditional blender. But whatever you do, make sure you only pulse it, and never fill your blender to much because soup is hot and it will explode. 

Trust me. 

Now, pour your soup back into your giant pot to heat, carve some bread, and get ready for a delicious homemade meal. Garnish with more pepper and your avocado (and vegan sour cream if you so desire). 

For my cheese loving friends. You might not have Nutritional Yeast on hand, or you might just prefer real cheese in your soup. If that is the case, you can omit the N.Yeast and at the very end, add a few cubes of mozzarella. It will melt and be all gooey and you’ll be all like, “daaaaaamn.” or whatever your popular catch phrase is this week. 

Enjoy, lovelies. 

Jalapeño, Avocado & Brie Poppers 

I read the back of a box of jalapeño poppers the other day. Needless to say, I was sorely disappointed in what I read. There was a ton of ingredients I couldn’t even make out (anything with a number in it is normally a bad sign), but more importantly, I don’t even think they were vegetarian. Sigh. 

Now, you and I both know how amazing the combination of brie and avocado is. But add in Jalapeño and we’re talking next level. 

But I didn’t want to “recreate” poppers today. No, today I had my creative juices flowing. So I took it up a notch. I made a mexican bean and seitan chipotle dough, stuffed it with Peppers, Avo and Brie, and fried/baked those suckers into golden deliciousness. 

And before we get started, I’d like to tell you that I made these in under an hour. Seriously. 

From Scratch. Prep and cooking time - UNDER 60 minutes. 

Make these because: Nothing in the world will make you as happy as putting these poppers down your pie hole. 

INGREDIENTS: 

1 Can (19fl oz) red mexican beans

1 Cup Gluten Flour

1 t, chipotle, cumin, garlic

1 T, Tomato paste

1 Cup, Broth 

1/2 Cup, Breadcrumbs 

1 Avocado 

1 Jalapeño, cut into small pieces 

Brie

lil’ milk

lil breadcrumbs

Oil for frying

DIRECTIONS:

Prepare broth. 

Preheat oven to 400•

Preheat a frying pan with oil (enough to cover the bottom, but not too much).

Rinse Beans (and smash them soooo good). 

Mix spices in with Gluten flour. Add to beans and slowly stir in half your broth. 

Mix together well until you have a dough like substance. Add more broth, paste, and breadcrumbs. 

You’ll now have a beany, seitan, crumby dough. And it’s going to be awesome. 

Dice up your Avo, jalapeño and brie. 

Separate a handful of dough and roll it out as thin as possible. 

Put a pile of Avo/Brie/Jal in the middle of your seitan dough, and wrap up as tight as possible. If there are holes or cracks, fill them in with more seitan mix. 

They should end up being about the size of a yoyo, or smaller. 

Now, time to dredge. 

On a small plate, pour out some milk (I use rice or almond). 

Next door, pour some breadcrumbs on to another plate. 

Anyone else starving right now?

Roll your seitan balls in the milk, then the crumbs, and toss into the hot oil. I say toss, but really, carefully place them in the oil.

Cook on all sides until brown. 

Now, put them in your preheated oven for 20 mins or less. When they are piping hot and starting to ooze cheese…. remove.

Note: if you roll them properly, your cheese will not spew. 

Full disclosure. I hate that word. *Spew*

Serve with a salsa, or get creative! And don’t forget to place on some paper towel to get rid of the excess oil. Because nobody needs that. 

SWEET POTATO & TOFU PATTIES 

Hey pals! 

Here’s a delicious addition to your breakfast arsenal. Make it on those iffy days where you just can’t figure out what to eat. I made these on a cold winter weekend, and they couldn’t have turned out better. Served with homefries and sautéed spinach, these won’t disappoint. Oh, and someone please remind me to have my camera charged at all times. Phones are cool and all, but they don’t take the best pictures. 

Ingredients:
One brick, extra firm tofu
One sweet potato 
One T, Soya Sauce (low sodium)
One Clove, garlic
One t, lemon juice
One T, Flour
One-Two T, Vegan Butter 
One Cup, Soy Milk
One t, mustard
One Cup, cheese/daiya
Cracked black pepper

DIRECTIONS:
Skin and cut your sweet potato. 
Boil in water until soft. Mash! Add a T of Butter if needed. Add salt & pepper as needed. 

While preparing the above, cut tofu into rectangles, about 1/2 an inch thick. Press out liquid and soak in mixture of garlic, soya sauce and lemon. 

Pan fry tofu until nice and brown. 

In saucepan, melt 1T of butter. Add flour and stir into paste. Slowly add milk at high temp while stirring vigorously. Sauce will thicken. 
Add cracked black pepper, mustard and cheese. If too thick, add more milk. 

Now, spoon a hefty portion of sweet potato onto tofu and top with cheese sauce. 

Make this because: You should prove to people that tofu scramble isn’t the only breakfast alternative you know. 

Merry Christmas everyone.

Here’s our Tofurkey, basted with a Poultry Seasoning/Shallot concoction, and highlighted with Yorkshire pudding, veggie gravy, carrots, peas, brussels sprouts, mashed potatoes, stuffing, and steamed kale! 

This year we had the pleasure of hosting a new guest who recently lost someone very near and dear to her. We have always had an open door policy, especially during the holidays, and our newly vegan friend was beyond excited to get a home cooked meal and some good company. It was our absolute pleasure. 

Anyway,

From my family to you and yours..

I hope you all had a wonderful Holiday filled with love and happiness. 

Dave Lock

Easy Seitan Sausages!

I have to just write this out and tell you the recipe, because with every passing second, my inner 10 year old is telling me to make dirty sausage jokes, and I know for a fact that I will give in. 

So here goes…

It’s often difficult to create a delectable protein that can be used in a variety of ways. This sausage does just that. 

Side order at Breakfast, in a pasta sauce, in a bun (straight from the BBQ), or just cut up and put in a sandwich. You can’t go wrong. 

The ingredients are simple, and if you’re a vegetarian, you should have all of this in your kitchen already. if not, everything listed is worth the investment. 

Make this because: You can tell all the jokes that I wanted to tell, but didn’t because my mom reads this and would not be impressed.

INGREDIENTS:

1 C, Gluten Flour
1 C (or less), Low Sodium Broth (I use Fake Beef)
1/2 t, each: Garlic powder, Onion powder, Cayenne
1 t, Cumin
1/4 T, Paprika
3/4 T, Soy Sauce (Low sodium)
3 T, Nutritional Yeast
2 Squirts, Liquid Smoke

RECIPE:

Mix wet ingredients together and make sure it is cool (fridge or freezer works quickest). 
Mix dry ingredients in a bowl and mix thoroughly. 
Now, mix wet + dry together. BUT WAIT! 
Add half of the liquid, mix, and add more little by little until you have an evenly formed “dough” ball. No remaining dry mix. You do not want to over soak your seitan. 
Now, cut into 3 even pieces and roll into a sausage. 
Place in tinfoil and carefully wrap it up, twisting the edges when complete. 
Steam for 40 minutes, flipping to make sure it steams evenly. 

Remove from heat, tinfoil, and check it out!!! SAUSAGE!

Now, get creative! 

Merry Christmas. 

Quinoa Curry, In a Hurry. 

Cook quinoa. Add whatever veggies you want ( I used carrot, peas, lentils), and add a tablespoon or two of your fav curry spice. I added strained tomato as well, and you can even add coconut milk. It’s easy, fast & delicious. I highly advise Naan on the side. 

Fin. 

Guacamole is super simple which means it’s pretty hard to screw up.

But there are thousands upon thousands of variations, 
all of which can be considered ’good’ (but not necessarily the best).

My guac has won many awards including: 
‘Best Superbowl Dip’ & ’Munchie Party Must have of 2010.’ 

And so what if I made both of those up- It’s seriously that good.

Follow these simple instructions to improve your guac. 

Ingredients:
Avocado (3)
3 strips of an onion, diced
1.5 limes
2 cloves garlic, diced
S&P 

Dirrrrections:
Squeeze lime juice into bowl with onion and garlic. Add two grinds of salt. 
LEAVE IT FOR TEN MINUTES.

Keep waiting, seriously.

That’s it. That’s the secret. 

‘Cook’ the onion and garlic by leaving it in the lime juice and salt for about ten minutes. Now, add your avo and pepper. Maybe more salt if you want, and you’re done. NOTE: Do not actually cook the garlic and onion. Just let it sit in the lime juice. This will soften it. ;)

Now, Take the party master award for being an epic guac maker. You’re welcome. 

Another Delicious Breakfast over here at Shove It Down Your Pie Hole.

Vegan Challenge: Fillet Mignon

Veggie Pals, unite. Although a contradiction by definition, Vegan Fillet Mignon is very doable. And I have the recipe to prove it. 

After a few discussions with some carnivorous friends of mine, I came to the realization that a veggie dish, similar enough to Fillet Mignon, can be created using some ingenuity and patience. 

By using a few new cooking methods, some old ideas from past creations, and a little cheating (the fake bacon was purchased), I came up with a recipe that is destined for greatness. 

What’s the Oscar equivalent for cooking? Maybe a lifetime achievement award for contributions to the veggie community? Okay, how about someone gives me a gold star and we call it a day? Either way, this recipe is impressive. 

Make this because: aren’t you a little bit curious?

Makes 4-8 Steaks, depending on the size.

Ingredients:

DRY 
1 t garlic powder
1 T paprika
1 t cumin
1 t, pepper
2 Cups vital gluten flour

WET 
3T braggs
8 squirts, liquid smoke ( I used the Hickory for this version)
1 1/3 Cups - FAKE beef broth
1 T Red WIne
1 t, marmite

RED WINE REDUCTION
I cup, Red Wine 
1/2 Cup, each, FAKE Beef+Chicken Broth
2 cloves of garlic, whole
1 stem of fresh rosemary

BROTH 
1 T, Red Wine
4 Cups - FAKE beef/chicken broth (mix)
1/8 Cup - Braggs

OTHER:

Fake bacon
Toothpicks
Side dish (Kale? Mashed Potatoes? etc)

Quick Note: The lower the sodium levels of your broth, the better. 

Directions:

First things first, let’s take a deep breath. 
This is easy, so let’s not get ahead of ourselves. Let’s do this. One. Step. At. A. Time.

WET:

Since I use broth cubes, I boil water, add broth and stir like mad. Once done, add the rest of the wet ingredients and mix thoroughly. Once mixed, put in the fridge or freezer and allow to cool. This is an important step. 

DRY:

Gently stir dry ingredients into the gluten flour. Use a ceramic or glass bowl to help avoid sticking when you eventually add the wet mix. 

BROTH:

While your wet ingredients are cooling in the fridge, mix your broth ingredients together in a large pot, and let it simmer on low heat. 

NOW,

Your broth is on, your wet mix has cooled, and you’re ready to go!
Genlty pour the wet mix into the dry mix and give it a stir! You’ll start to see the gluten flour turn into a meat like substance. Breath a sigh of relief. Feel free to get your hands in there (wash first, kiddies), and help form the dough. Once completely mixed, place “meat” on the cutting board and roll into a long roll. If you need a hand forming it, wrap it in a bit of saran or parchment. Drop that into your broth and simmer for 30-40 minutes. Easy, Peasy. *(Note: remove parchment &/or Saran before simmering)

REDUCTION:

While your faux meat is simmering, you have some time to make the perfect reduction. The trick here is to cook the wine on low to help evaporate the alcohol but pull A LOT of flavour. Start by putting everything except the broth into a saucepan. Heat on low for about 20 minutes, or until the liquid is about half. 
Now, add your broth and continue simmering on low until it has reduced by half again. You will end up with about 1/2 cup of liquid, but holy moly will it be worth it. 
When done, drain through a small hole strainer (to remove rosemary stem and garlic) and set aside. 

GUESS WHAT?

You’re steak is done & so is your reduction! Remove from broth and press out as much liquid as possible. You can put it in cheesecloth or a clean dishtowel and press with books if needed. 
Now, cut your faux meat into steaks and wrap a piece of faux bacon around it! Oh, and toothpicks will hold it together, so you needn’t worry. 
Toss into the oven at 450• for 10-15 minutes each side, just to give it that crispy steak texture. 
NOTE: If you have ever had steak, you can have it cooked medium, medium well done, well done, etc etc. The oven is where you decide how you’d like your ‘steak.’ The longer, the more well done!

Once cooked to perfection, serve with your favourite sides, and pour a few tablespoons of your reduction on top for added flavour and juiciness. 

My suggestion? Steam some Kale and serve with these twice baked potatoes, which I made last week, except as a mash instead of a 2x bake. 

Delicious. 

Til next time, 

Dave

Avo-Scramble-Cado

Avocados make the perfect bowls for a light breakfast. 
Toss your Scrambled Tofu (or eggs) right into your Avo halves, and top it off with a quickly made Guac. 

Easy, right? Serve with some PB on toast and some fresh fruit. 

Have a great breakfast.  And an even better day. 

Simple tofu & broccoli!

We wanted to make a very simple Tofu dish. 

While hanging out yesterday, a few pals and I created this very simple dish. From start to finish we only spent about 25 minutes cooking, and this recipe fed three. 

Feel free to add and subtract as you see fit, once you get the hang of it.

The two pals that ate with me were impressed with the tofu (well, the meal in its entirety), and we all admitted that had we marinaded it longer, it would have been EVEN BETTER. 

Make this because: you have to start somewhere, and this is the perfect starting point for those interested in experimenting with tofu. For serious.

INGREDIENTS:

One brick of Tofu
1/4 C, Low Sodium Soya Sauce
1/8 C, Red Wine Vinegar or Balsamic
1/2 T, Brown Sugar (or more, to taste)
1/2 lemon, juice
3 drops, Liquid Smoke
Your Fav Hot Sauce.
1 Large clove, garlic, minced
1-2 Stalks of broccoli, cut into bite sized pieces. 
1 pack, noodles (your choice)

DIRECTIONS:

Press tofu to remove water. Cut into small triangles, 8 total pieces.

(Cut in half lengthwise, then cut in triangle 1/4’s.)

Mix together Soya sauce, brown sugar, vinegar, lemon juice and liquid smoke - and marinade the tofu in the fridge. The longer you leave it, the better, up to 24 hours. We did it for under ten minutes because we were hungry. Still very good. 

Heat a pan with oil on medium and cook tofu. Save marinade.  After 5 mins, flip and cook other side. As its cooking, add garlic and broccoli. You can add a little bit of the remaining marinade on the broccoli. Once the garlic is cooked and the broc is green, pump up the heat to 6-7 and fry for a few minutes to get that nice crispy outside.

Boil water and add noodles. Drain and mix with a few tablespoons of the left over marinade, and your hot sauce. 

Serve!

We had a great time making this simple dish, and an even better time eating it. Obvsss.

Oh. and don’t forget…like, share and follow!

LET’S EXPERIMENT: Cauliflower and Lentil Pasta Sauce

It’s not everyday that I get to experiment like this. 

I typically stick to the same few recipes, and even when I go out of my bubble, I tend to use a lot of the same stuff. 

But today I wanted to be a little more creative. I had some lentils and a half head of cauliflower to use up, and was (surprisingly) in the mood for pasta. So there wasn’t anything I could do except create a new dish!

Shucks. 

This is a vegan, gluten-free sauce, that could be classified as a mix between cheese and Alfredo. You can also use white beans if you want it to be the same colour as an Alfredo sauce. And if you do eat cheese, you can grate some in at the end! Everyone wins!

Make this because: You’ll never have another pasta sauce with this much protein and veggies. Or maybe you will, but it won’t taste like this. Fact*

Ingredients:

1/2 head, cauliflower

2 handfulls, lentils (drained and rinsed).

2 lrg clove, garlic, minced

1 large, shallot, diced

1 t, nutmeg

3-5 T, Nutritional yeast

1 T, Paprika

S&P

Soy/Almond milk (roughly 1/2 C)

Oil. 

Directions:

Saute onion/garlic in oil. 

Boil cauliflower for 5-7 minutes then drain.

Blend Lentils/Cauliflower together and add a little bits of milk at a time until you get the right consistency. 

Now add in Gar/Onion, paprika. Blend again and put in saucepan. 

Add nutritional yeast (and/or cheese) and stir. 

Pour over fav pasta. I baked mine in the oven for 15 minutes at 400•.

You can do the same or just dig in!

SPINACH AND ARTICHOKE DIP 

Ladies and gentlemen. 

Today we start a new chapter. 

The end of a long weekend. 

The start of a new season (soonish?).

And a new relationship between bread and dip.

I happened upon some silken tofu this past week and thought long and hard about what recipe to experiment with. After seeing the recipes online for Spinach/Artichoke dip, I knew I could make my own version of the classic dip. And in the process, make it a little bit healthier.  

And I admit, while mine was not 100% dairy free, you can easily substitute. So dig in, Vegans. Oh wait. Did I mention that it’s gluten free as well? Just use carrots to dip instead of bread.

Make this because: Spinach & Artichoke dip is amazing and you will love it and so will your guests and it’s not that bad for you and it has artichokes and when was the last time you cooked with them? 

Ingredients:

10-12 oz (1 pack) spinach
2, garlic cloves, minced 
2 shallots, minced
1 pack, silken tofu
1 jar, artichokes
1 t, basil
1 t, parsley
2 t, lemon juice
1/2 cup, Nutritional Yeast
1 t, Braggs
1.5 t, Salt
1/2 t, pepper
3/4 cup, cheese (or sub)
1.5 T, Oil

Steps:

Sauté garlic/onion and then add spinach. 

Meanwhile, blend all other ingredients (except cheese) in blender. 

Mix together spinach, tofu and cheese and stir. Pour into an oven-safe pan and bake in your oven at 350• for 30 minutes. 

Eat with bread. 

Oh, by the way. We ate this and liked it a whole ton! 

Note: If you have an expensive, tasty, stink cheese (for the non-vegans), or some vegan parmesan, toss some in as well.